The past month or so has been pretty tough. I’ve been busy recording drums for two of my bands. I broke my collarbone snowboarding and have been couch / bed ridden for two weeks now.

But more importantly, or more associated with writing, I’ve had a tough time focussing and working out what I want to say. I’m finding I have a general idea of what I want to write about, I.e. plot points. But then I get “ideas” I think should be in there, or as I write I begin questioning what is happening and why, or realising there is no conflict and feeling like there should be conflict but then not liking the idea of conflict, or realising to identify and resolve conflict is a process in itself.

I’ll use chapter 7 as an example (I’d use chapter 8 but it just came out yesterday – YES CHAPTER 8 IS OUT fyi):

Spoiler alert!

The plot points were:

  1. Jean has to grow up
  2. The crew on Sirrius have to interact to a point where we get to know Dragan and Ceylan a bit
  3. Handi has to wake up
  4. Handi has to have amnesia
  5. We have to try and get an idea of “business as usual” on the ship

Writing around this then had problems of: What part of Jean growing up do I show when it can be max 2,000 words when the last we saw her was a year old. Without being.

What do the crew do that is not mission jeopardising to show their characters when I can only write from Jean’s perspective and for all intents and purposes they’re all trapped in a tin can?

How much does Handi freak out and should he freak out, what would that mean, is that just unnecessarily dragging things out again?

I guess, I have a problem with getting to the tone or essence of what I want to write and also visualising things specifically. I’ll admit most of when I’m writing I don’t have a concrete idea of what the scene looks like, the sensual details, what the tone or point of the scene is. I generally follow the initial idea through, see wherever it goes, and then find out after writing it that it’s not really working or is too self indulgent.

Perhaps, it is a symptom of the structure I’ve chosen to write the book in?

Perhaps I’m too distracted and I’m not finding my subconscious dream state zone where I’m able to truly inhabit my characters and allow them to be present in the moment?

It may also be a case of writing on my phone where getting a grasp of pacing is difficult to get a feel of.

I’m not sure. Maybe all of the above. Just some of the things I’m struggling with at the moment in writing and keeping motivated.

In any case, Chapter 8 is up. Let me know what you think 🙂

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